edition = Basic Cards author = SCCG team background = stucco.jpg type = Event panel = magicroundabout1.jpg Interesting, Well Planned Panel Gala Dinner Book Launch panel = heman1.jpg Monster Truck Rally, staring John Truck-a-saurus panel = magicroundabout1.jpg Comic Panel Closing Ceremony Pyjama Party Jelly Wrestling Rail Baron Tournament Filking Awards Ceremony Video Stream Opening Ceremony Skinny dipping The Dodgy Lager Brothers put on a Cocktail Party type = Attack panel = godzilla1.jpg Joke T-shirt Nibbles, Everyone is distracted by small bowls of nibbles No Pets! Aliens kidnap your guest Your guest is an obnoxious redneck Air-conditioning breakdown Someone strikes a match in the video lounge Power slammed into a chair Caffeine free, Taste free The floor collapses in the Fan Lounge Dead man, Dead panel 9am panel Gone to the bar No Beer! Your guests reveal that they're actually here for the A.A. meeting Invasion of the puffy people Cancelled Venue Harlan Ellison parachutes in! Your video stream has been programmed by a blind lemur Your Treasurer fails to take the GST into consideration No Room Parties Allowed WARNING: Excess consumption may have a laxative effect The lifts don't work! Morlocks break into the fan lounge and steal all your coffee Your American guest goes on a shooting rampage! Your convenor "wins LOTTO" and goes to Majorca Police Raid No Fast Food The food is too expensive! Dress code enforced An apocalyptically large meteor is on a collision course with your venue! type = Venue panel = hotel.jpg Rydges Hotel The Old Swan Brewery The Ascot Inn The Secret Fortress of Doom The Moonbase Nicho's Lungs The Metro Hotel The Grand Chancellor Hotel Perth Convention Centre type = Guest panel = fragglerock2.jpg Neil Gaiman Nigel Tufnell William Gibson panel = heman1.jpg Robert Jordan panel = fragglerock2.jpg Chip Livingstone L.Ron Hubbard Arthur C. Clarke panel = drh-mistresspokemon.jpg Ippongi Bang panel = fragglerock2.jpg Kim Stanley Robinson Neal Stephenson type = Fan Guest Grant & Simon Russell B. Farr Grant Stone Mitch? type = Miscellaneous panel = clever.jpg All you can eat buffet That does not make sense! Wookies do not live on Endor! * If the Wookies live on Endor you must acquit. Look at the stupid monkey... Ne-ever gonna happen! A BIG sack of Drugs. The Underpants Gnomes, Time to go to work, work all night, search for underpants hey! * We won't stop till we have underpants, yum-tum yummy-tum-tay! Streaker! The 1% rule Internet Access That would require a tiny amount of effort Furry Fans You'll have someone's eye out with that! And that's a bad thing because? E.M.P. Electro Magnetic Pulse Fans don't let Fans do Fans edition = Expansion Pack 1 author = Jason Funnel type = Event panel = magicroundabout1.jpg Filking * It's as good as karaoke Early morning board-gaming * Well it started yesterday afternoon... World Building Panel * again Opening Ceremony * Thanks for coming Masked Ball * 100 hours of labour, 2 hours of ball Guest Of Honour Speech Book Launch Room Party * not on the programme but indispensible Chainmail making workshop * for those with a high boredom threshold Freeform * you too can play an anti-social, black dressed, pale skinned night owl (a vampire of course) Art show Closing Ceremony * Thanks for coming Auction * Got too much money? This'll help Video Stream * Not got a room and need somewhere to sleep? type = Attack panel = godzilla1.jpg Harper-Collins calls the shots Guest mobbed by fans, vows never to leave room again Boring Monologue * No, let me finish Fundamentalists break in! * And you though fans were scary NO COFFEE! * some things just can't be forgiven Coke machine runs dry, and it's a Sunday! The bar is closed for Easter * You mean I have to stay sober for the whole weekend? Overpawering stench * Why the strange expression? Disgruntled hotel employee * be nice Ditmars Rigged * and the winner is... me! The Old Guard * it's not as good as SwanCon 6 Front Desk Unmanned * civilisation crumbles Battlefield Earth is released Budget cuts * GoH flew first class 9a.m. time slot! Over enthusiastic fan takes over panel Anime in Video Stream is dub only * if you're that hard-core then learn Japanese Slow restaurant service Guest gets blind drunk * and can I have my bar tab as expenses? Cape and Shorts combo * some things should not be Programming error * an appreciation of J.G. Ballard's Crash type = Guest panel = fragglerock2.jpg panel = drh-mistresspokemon.jpg Storm Constantine Ippongi Bang panel = drh-mistresspokemon.jpg William Gibson Lois McMaster Bujold Stephen Dedman Robert Silverberg Sean Williams J.K. Rowling Terry Pratchett type = Fan Guest Gina Goddard Russell B. Farr type = Venue panel = hotel.jpg Burswood The Metro Inn * anyone for skinny dipping? The Hyatt Japan The Ascot Inn The Sheraton Empire State Building The Rydges Hotel The Orchid Hotel The King's Hotel Parent's House * yeah yeah, just a few friends Shoebox Wheelie bin type = Miscellaneous panel = clever.jpg Restaurant taken over by fans Good Pheremone Day * lets do it. OK Common interest in big attribute scores Too sleep deprived to care * n avwhrg;obrig Attractive first time attendee It happened in the video room so no-one saw it And that's a bad thing because? Jeremy G Byrne takes over the world Cool T-shirt Close Personal Friend The aliens give him back Oh yeah, well I'll do push-ups... Naked! Bartok is played Daleks and Stairs * 'there are good Daleks and bad Daleks' That's a serious ramp! Harry Potter slash Goths lurk Distracted by Normality Your point being? It may be weird, but it's still Cool It's alright, we accept anyone in Fandom * often said through clenched teeth Pizza Arrives Furry Fandom Chocolate Coated Coffee Beans background = background_1.jpg edition = Battle 3000 Expansion author = Anon type = Venue panel = hotel.jpg Mother Ship type = Attack panel = godzilla1.jpg Subspace Jamming Lasgun 1 High Tech Espionage edition = Unisfa type = Attack author = James Andrewartha Fire alarm set off * and the sprinklers turn on author = Phil McLean Poke-Ball * I Choose You! Terrible pun Too far away, too expensive to get there * Mullaloo? But that's miles away! author = Tom Pope Deathstar blows up your venue * But we're a peaceful convention! No-one's heard of your guest * They don't believe he exits BSOD * Stupid Microsoft piece of crap author = Tom Eitelhuber A fridge fell on him author = Marcia Bauer panel = drh-mistresspokemon.jpg Pikachu! Thundershock, now! type = Miscellaneous panel = clever.jpg author = James Andrewarth Jedi mind tricks * This isn't the Con you're looking for Riiiiiiiiiiiight That was just flavour text author = Phil McLean Player distracted * Sorry, I was writing one of these silly blank cards and wasn't paying attention That is too stupid even for this game * What do you take us for? If he can do it so can I Look - it's a diversion! Offsite backup author = Oliver Mailes But it's so cool!!!!